Chapter 24

Sunday evening he sat alone watching tv. Not exactly alone, the rest of the group was there too but his arm rested over the back of the chair where Sarah would have been sitting. Would she once again sit in his arms or was this morning the last time he got to hold her?

He didn’t want to think about it. He wanted her to make the right decision but he feared that what he thought was the right decision, she might not and he really didn’t want to think about that.

First the first time in almost four weeks he thought about alcohol, he needed a drink. It was his usual way to forget his worries and clear his mind. He wanted to forget and have an empty mind, nothing to think about. He felt lonely, the friends he had made had left the center and the friends he had were on stage, now he was alone, worrying about Sarah.

He wasn’t exactly worried about her, a strong woman like her would be fine, but would their relationship be too? He wished he could force those thoughts away but in a place like this he couldn’t do that the way he used to.

It wouldn’t change anything, he knew that, alcohol only made him momentarily forget his problems and he had learned not to drink his problems away but face them. He knew that before too but facing them was a difficult thing.

The only problem was that he couldn’t face them until Thursday. Then he knew he’d go on with Sarah or without her. Why couldn’t he stop thinking about it?

When the couch dipped next to him, he looked up, he hadn’t been that deep in thought for weeks and when he was everyone kept interrupting him. His mind had been so occupied that he didn’t hear anybody approach.

“Are you alright?” He looked up to focus on Megane; he hadn’t expected her to be the one to ask a question like that. “Yeah I’m alright.” Richie said even though he knew he wasn’t and his voice made it clear. “You don’t look alright. You look sad, you miss Sarah.” Megane said without making it a question.

He didn’t answer, why did she even care? If it were any place but this she’d be one of those groupies that sneaked backstage. “You really like her.” She pushed for an answer.

He didn’t want to talk to her, what did she know? How would she know who he liked and didn’t like. Maybe she should see who he didn’t like and leave him alone.

“Fine, don’t answer.” She said after a while. “I know you do. I sort of know you and I haven’t seen you this happy in years.” “You don’t know me.” Came his sharp answer. Fans always thought they knew him when in fact they didn’t know anything at all.

“I don’t mean I know you like that, I mean as a fan, I haven’t seen you this happy in pictures since Heather.” Megane explained, still full of confidence, it didn’t seem to bother her he almost yelled at her.

Richie thought it over, he did feel really happy around Sarah, everything was better with her around. But as happy as he was with Heather? He loved Heather, all the years they were together and still. Did he feel the same way about Sarah? He’d only known her for a few weeks. He couldn’t be in love with her. At least not yet, he didn’t even know if she was going to show up and start their relationship for real.

“So what are you saying?” He asked Megane. So he liked Sarah, what about it? “Nothing, I’m just saying it’s obvious you like Sarah.” She shrugged like his question couldn’t be easier to answer.

He nodded, he knew that, he liked Sarah from the first time they got to spend time together alone.

“A lot.” Megane finally added. A smile appeared on his face. “See,” Megane said, “you do like her.” Richie smiled even wider. “I do, a lot; right now I miss her so much I wonder if I’ll see her again.” He said honest.

Maybe Megane wasn’t such a bad person anyway, she got him to talk and admit he liked Sarah. Maybe she wasn’t that bad after all.

“Why wouldn’t you see her again? Didn’t you tell her how much you like her?” Megane asked a little confused. Richie shook his head. “Of course I told her but she might think she can’t do it.” Richie tried to explain, he didn’t feel like he could tell Sarah’s story. He started to like Megane but couldn’t trust her with that.

“She might not be able to do it? You’re confusing me Richie, what are you talking about?” Megane asked, more confused than earlier. After seeing Sarah run away last Friday she thought they were together.

He thought a minute for a way to explain without too much detail. “Sarah isn’t sure if she can handle a relationship right now.” Richie explained easily without giving away details about Sarah’s life. “Oh,” Megane said, “but she likes you.” It wasn’t a question she was asking, she knew.

Richie shrugged. “She says she does but when we get close, she runs away.” He thought of earlier that morning. She had actually ran away, the first week, she spend days hiding from him. Running away was something she hadn’t done before.

He tried not to start wondering about it but it hurt, knowing he had made her so uncomfortable that she couldn’t talk to him or stay with him and the only solution was running away from him.

“She really does like you.” Megane insisted. Richie shrugged again, he knew Sarah had said it and meant it but now he wasn’t sure if she liked him enough to get past the fears she had.

“Trust me,” Megane started again, “I know people and she likes you, you’ll see.” She sounded so sure of it, like Sarah had confided in her with her feelings. “I hope so.” Richie really hoped she was right but the only way to really find out was waiting until Thursday morning when he would leave the rehab center. “Trust me.” Megane reassured him again.

“How can you be so sure?” Richie asked. The songs he played may be about hope and not giving up, and he knew he should take his own advice but right now he didn’t feel very hopeful. He was scared, what if he never saw her again, if she didn’t take the step she needed to take.

“Like I said, I know people. I could see right away how much you like each other. Well after…” Megane told him. Friday she had no clue but when she saw them going outside Saturday, she could see it immediately.

“We were trying to keep it unnoticed.” He thought their efforts had been a waste. Did everyone know? Tina knew, but she had cameras.

Megane chuckled. “Come on Richie, I told you, I know people. I haven’t heard anyone else mention it.”

“Okay then.” He hoped she was right. “How come you know people so well then? Are you a psychologist or something?” It would explain her knowledge of people but what would a psychologist do at a rehab center? Didn’t a psychologist help people at a rehab center?

“Not at all but I see a lot of people at my job and you get to know people like that.” Megane explained with a shrug like it was that simple.

After a few more minutes, their subject changed to small talk. They quite enjoyed talking to each other until Megane stood up from the couch. “I’m going to bed, see you tomorrow.” She said as she made her way out of the room.

Richie had started to feel pretty tired for the last few minutes too. “Wait, I’ll walk with you.” He said as he tried to catch up with her.


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